Relationships are hard work! Whether you're talking about romantic relationships, sibling relationships, relationships with friends, colleagues and even acquaintances - all these forms of relationships bring with them difficulties, and relationship questions you'd like answering.
Well, I have good news for those of you looking for relationship advice online. There is an 'easy solution' to all your relationship woes, and that solution is YOU...
And that's what this relationship article is going to be about. And, together with 3 quotes about relationships, we're going to discover how WE - you and I - can improve our relationships by simply improving ourselves, and how we respond to life...
Relationship Quote #1:
"Problems in relationship occur because each person is concentrating on what is missing in the other person." -- Wayne Dyer
So let's start with a basic truism about relationship problems. If we continue to think it's the other person's fault our relationship with that person is going to continue being a 'problem'.
I know that life would be a whole lot easier if this other person (that you're having relationship problems with) would one day just realise how foolish they've been, if they'd just 'see the light', and admit that they were wrong; that they'd just change their ways.
But it's not going to happen any time soon, mainly because it's just not true. It takes two to Tango, in any relationship. Which means, no matter if a relationship is going well or going badly, it's both your 'faults'.
And that's what Wayne Dyer's rather succinct quote about relationships reveals.
So STOP, stop looking at what the other person is doing wrong and START, start looking at what you could be doing better. Start looking at the relationship from the other person's viewpoint - a little bit of empathy goes a very, very long way. Talking of which...
Relationship Quote #2:
"Personal relationships are the fertile soil from which all advancement...all success... all achievement in real life grows." -- Ben Stein
Yes, perhaps the whole point of relationships with others - romantic, or otherwise - is to show us 'ourselves', the good bits and the bad.
Of course it never looks like that, when we meet someone that we really do not like, that we argue with furiously. But these are the relationships we should treasure, he said counter-intuitively, because these are the relationships that are trying to reveal to us 'secrets' and 'dark places' that we'd rather not have revealed.
Relationships challenge us. And if we're being honest, we know it's NOT just because the other person is challenging. If we're being honest - and being honest with yourself, and then with others, is a vital ingredient to having healthy relationships in your life - we know it's because we have yet more to learn about life, and about ourselves.
That's what ol' Ben Stein means with his inspirational quote about relationships.
For when we recognise, then meet, then overcome our relationship challenges, then we grow as human beings, we grow...
Relationship Quote #3:
"The purpose of a relationship is not to have another who might complete you, but to have another with whom you might share your completeness." -- Neale Donald Walsch
Hmm, and when we stop looking outwards for help, start looking inwards again, then we can then become strong enough to not need to be in a relationship, then we can begin to enjoy our relationships like we never have before.
Strong, healthy relationships are about being open (vulnerable) to what life (and your relationships) want to bring you. You do not attach yourself to specific outcomes, instead you trust that whatever comes your way you are strong enough to fully embrace.
And then, then you can share your completeness with another, and life truly will feel all that it can be...
Openness, vulnerability, and truly 'being seen' - all of these states of being will help anyone, no matter how 'advanced' and 'wise' they are, have more fulfilling relationships.
But it all starts with recognising that a) blaming 'the other' is not the solution, b) relationships are meant to be challenging, to teach us about ourselves, and c) when we grow as human beings, the quality of our relationships grows likewise...